A letter of concern and advice

Dear almost cute guy at the gym

I could not help but over hear your comments to your friend today about how you are finding it hard to meet someone to date.

Well let me tell you, there is a very good reason for this.

You dress like a model for Arnold Palmers line of clothes in the Sears Catalogue.

No really, you do.

You are attractive enough, you have a nice body (not that I was paying that much attention to you every time you undress anywhere near me), you seem to have a decent career.

But your clothes kind of reflect your as exciting as organic oatmeal personality.

So, not only do you dress poorly (or like someone only my Grandmother would find attractive), your clothes kind of reflect on your personality (and they reflect in what I must say is a fairly true to life kind of way).

Here is what I suggest. Go shopping anywhere besides Sears. Go to the gap, Club Monaco, Bluenotes, even tip top tailors, but stay away from Sears. And if you are ordering your Arnold Palmeresque clothes from the Sears catalogue - dude, honestly. Turn the page to somewhere else. I am sure that catalogue has a few more exciting items that are not entirely acrylic based fabrics.

Please, do this not for me, but for yourself. Only older ladies (And I mean real old) are gonna find your fashion sense attractive.

I hope I have helped

NOAU