Mr. Information is annoyed by sheer stupidity

One of the great joys of being a librarian is that you get to help people who genuinly appreciate it.
It is always nice when someone says Thank you for doing your job.
However, we also deal with a bunch of fucking morons who come to the library simply because they know that we are a captive audience and have to help them (within reason).
My most recent brush with retarstupilameness is with my least favourite patron of this library (each library has one, and I am sure that these people don't know who they are or how much we the library staff HATE them) is one who comes in, does not want books, only wants print outs from the internet, but does not want to pay for them since she does not want a book. (I found out that the reason she does not want books is that she can not return them - at all. This is not someone who has difficulty returning books on time, but she thinks that once she checks them out that they should become part of her personal library - so precious she is).
This woman's most recent request was that she wanted to know exactly how time travel worked. I calmly told her that as far as I was aware time travel was science fiction and thus I could not give her any actual "information" on how it would occur.
She still wanted the information on the specifics of time travel.
Again I reiterated that the information that I could find would all be fiction and so therefore is not actually information, but ummm . . . well entertaiment.
She had difficulty accepting this. Asking me several times why I could not find information on how time travel works (she likes to pretend that I don't know how to do my job or that I am purposfully not giving her the information just cause I like to have all the power).
Finally she changed her mind, it was not time travel at all that she wanted but time zones.
No, no wait - not time zones but time capsules. How specifically do time capsules work?
Okay, now for this question I have to be honest, how can you not be aware on the general idea of how a time capsule works? (for those of you who are reading this and saying "how does a time caspule work?" - I HATE YOU! and it works by putting something into a protective package, burying it, and then years later digging it up and being awed by how much has changed) I almost asked her if she was serious. Instead I went to wikipedia, looked it up, printed it out and got rid of her.

And the odd thing is that she did not thank me for my hard work with her.
Some people's children, honestly!